Come to think about it, I find myself having a completely different approach with almost everything I do, but that's another topic for another time. Today I would like to talk about the most important lesson I learned in the past four months. That is patience and allowing myself the opportunity to take in all that is around me. As you all know I am extremely grateful for everything I have and everyone in my life. I look at my parents, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles and boyfriend. Everyone is a blessing, but when I graduated college my only goal was to obtain. Whether it be a great job with more money, more degrees, more trips a new car, I was only focused on the things I knew were coming for my own good. Not a doubt in my mind these things will come ten fold and then some - soon enough, but I had to take a step back, because I needed a whole new mindset to take my life to the next level.
I pitied myself for weeks, not being able to find the job of my dreams fresh out of college, I wanted it all by the age of 25 at least. In my journey I was to take in all He has blessed me with, I was obligated to seek inner peace with myself first and than adjust to what was around me.
These past four months I learned the process of planning, patience and taking on every opportunity that came my way. Thinking back on this summer, learning about these three things hands on were harder than they sound. There were times I had to get off social media, because I was feeding into the small picture social media tend to give most people. I had to look back at old photos to remind myself my life was fantastic and I was delusional to ever devalue it because I did not get all I wanted right out of college.
Shit, I even had to look at some people's situations and shack my head a few times for ever feeling sorry for myself. I had to read more, I had to really listen to the things older people wanted to talk to me about, not just greet them and act like I was in a hurry or had some where to be when they started telling me life stories. Sometimes I even had to just sit in peace and remain in solitude. It may sound absurd but the thing I didn't want the most was to fall in trap of thinking anything I had or did was not good enough. I seen people go crazy over that shit, and had to catch myself quick.
I can say I no longer seek to compare myself to others. I gain no satisfaction knowing things for me is going well in one area of life and not so well for someone else. I gain no satisfaction in bragging about the little work I have done thus far, I know my actions will speak for itself in the future.
Now that my 23rd birthday is approaching, I have a whole new perspective on life, not sure if it is the one I will have forever; but it is a great start in my journey into young adulthood. Consciousness is essential, knowing what I eat and drink helps fuel me, knowing who I put my energy into, puts me into the right mindset, and my conversations with God gives me life, and direction.
I know this post may be a lot different from the rest of my blogs and well maybe a little more confusing but I know those who have been trying to look for direction and have finally found some, maybe even a small piece of direction can relate.